I’m a mom. I have a daughter that lives in my house and requires my complete attention for most of my daily hours and some of my nightly. It wasn’t easy getting to this place of joy and struggle. My husband and I have been the outliers on the bell curve of pregnancy. We have been the recipients of world crushing news about the baby we thought we would take home one day. At those crossroads, we have been fortunate enough to live in a country that supported us, informed us and allowed us to make a choice in the direction our lives would take. After every test available, it was confirmed that our first pregnancy was affected by Trisomy 21. After much research, we made the heartbreaking decision that 98% of people with this information tend to make. Let me be clear up front that I fully support a woman’s right to choose. I am pro choice and not just pro my choice. If you do not share this mentality, you may find this a difficult environment to explore as I intend to share details of our journey as well as details of life with our rainbow baby. This is a part of me and has been tightly woven into my fabric. I carried our sweetheart Baby King in my belly for 21 weeks and 3 days (a disturbingly ironic amount of time) and we will forever carry our first in our hearts.
My daughter, Phoebe Iris, would not be here if we hadn’t interrupted our genetically unhealthy pregnancy. In a way, BK sort of tagged her in to the ring of life, with a “good luck buddy, you have a better chance at this whole thing”. Or at least, that’s a comforting thought for me.
Heavy stuff right?! I know. Don’t worry, I write about diaper rash too.
Before our insane journey through pregnancy – diagnosis – termination – grieving – trying to conceive – pregnancy – and an absolutely brutal labor and delivery, I was a person with thoughts and friends and ambitions of my own. I grew up in New England. No it is not a place in Europe. Ok, dammit. I was born in Boston and raised in Southern New Hampshire. I left clicking my heels for Southern California at the ripe old age of 18 after a year at a small school in Pennsylvania (just as boring as it sounds). I studied Horticulture to grow my own pot… just kidding. After 5 years in California, I wanted to be closer to my ‘lil bro and moved to Vancouver, Canada. We are citizens of the world, you see. Flailed around here for a while with no real direction, decided my back hurt after 13 years in the industry and I moved from Horticulture on to my other passion, wine! I moved to Melbourne and a boy chased me. We had many adventures while I pursued an education in wine and I married the guy. He’s pretty cool. I call him Babe but most refer to him as Andrew.
We came back to Vancouver after Australia gave us the boot and here we are. I’m a certified winemaker but have never made the stuff since I was 3 months pregnant with our first when I finished my certificate. Soon after we found ourselves in one of lifes particularly dark valleys. We went through our struggle and gathered up our shit and decided to continue living and continue working towards the family and life we had always dreamed of. Now I’m a professional baby maker/bum wiper/drool catcher/laundry doer and with any luck, you fine people will be interested in my story and journey through momhood and I can be a mommy blogger too.